so I have a really nice weekend. Hung out with Drew and Rachel which was the good part of the weekend. I got some awesome art work from drew makes me sick cause I wish I could draw that good!
I want to get a tattoo if only I had money to do so.
Anyways I know I said this before but I hate liars so much whats the use. Anyways I am so sick of getting fucked over it's so ridiculous. I mean come on people. It's no hard to stay true and be truthful. I think this person tells the truth to everyone but me. It's so sad how this person hides shit that is totally stupid. It's stupid. I feel used and hidden and ugly. But whatever it's not on my mind I am not doing anything wrong. I'm loving and doing what your supposed to do to someone you have feelings for.
anyways I found the book I wrote and read it and felt horrible because I use to have all my shit together when I was 16 I knew my life ahead of me. Then relationships happened. POINT is I am going to take a pad of paper some paint and a pen and paint brush and just travel the world and live out of a suit case and when I feel like I am at where I wanted to go and I have found myself around people who needs me and wants me around I will stay and I will wake up with a smile.
I don't know what or who I believe in anymore. I can't believe in myself or what I think or what I see. I can't express who I am or what I like. You should never be scared or stupid for who you are and what you believe ever. This whole fucking world is fucked up and some people just want you to die in misery. If you think of free thinking and try to live for yourself then you will be killed.
I just want to be free of all these feelings. I just want to know love. I just want to know what is to be loved and to love not only a person but myself.
But I got to spend time with dustin which was great.I met alot of good people and alot of tools. I feel like a certain person is getting caught in between both.
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